This was basically me, last night. Except approx. 1 more litre of blood. And me being a girl and shit. I now have no right front tooth. The triage nurses were pretty impressed about how rough, rugged and raw I am. Coming into emergency, looking like a battered wife, with a giant red cast on my leg. I was actually wearing a wife beater, also, covered in dirt and blood. Ironic, huh.
Fuck you, crutches. Fuck you, rain. Combined you make a lethal weapon that involves me sitting on Cameron Stack's lap in the front seat of a 1960's Citroen that weighs about as much as a can of sardines, crying my eyes out and using an LA do-rag to mop up the copious amounts of blood gushing from my mouth. What up, Royal Perth. Cheers for the stitches and the fact that I sat there waiting for treatment in the corrider of the Emergency Room for 3 hours because my Dr. slipped over and sprained her little weinor ankle, which obviously rated high above me.
I think today to cheer myself up I might do a photo shoot of the C.O.D. eating a bucket of chicken with me with no front tooth. Right before I spend excruciating hours at the dentist at 2pm. Better get as many photo shots of me being a gap toothed bitch in as I possibly can in the next 2 hours. Hit me on my digits if you want to partake. Obviously you all do.
2 comments:
ive been cruising the net just waiting for the moment when this blog would arise.
dear god,
please leave youre faithful counterpart G.O.D alone!
wtf happened too karma?
arent you due too win shitloads of money and bitches and fast cars soon.
fuck, as if having a hellord wasnt enough "badness" for one lifetime.
PS// if you do win lots of money, you know i expect you too buy us a house with a cigarette vending machine installed, right?
PPS// i wish this kind of thing happened too real estate agents.
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