We're all going to get pregnant!!!

We are closer than ever to a male contraceptive pill which means that we are all closer to getting pregnant.

I'm sorry if this seems like feminist jingoism but men cannot be trusted, especially when fucking is involved. By the time the male pill is released I'll most likely be past my prime and will neither have to deal with men lying and saying they're on the pill or my friends whinging that some lying dirtbag got them pregnant, thank fuck.

Women in the past (and probs present) have pretended to be on the pill to get pregnant and lock a man down. But that doesn't really work anymore since practically every kid these days is the product of a fling or one night stand. It is totally cool for dudes to get ladies preggers and not marry them.

But if a guy pretended to be on the pill to lock a girl down then it might be different. Having a baby requires a lot of time not working and a fuck load of money so a ladee might be more inclined to ruin her life (aka get married) if some dude gets her preggs. I'm sure if any of our male readers have gotten this far into the post they are all like "men aren't like that" but there are loads of crazy, creepy, sensitive guys who want nothing more than to trap a girl in their depressing and mediocre lives.

So in conclusion I think less time should be spent on the male contraceptive pill and more on getting us this fabulous abortion pill I've been hearing all about.

Love from Doney

xoxo