Monday, May 10, 2010

Mini Bummers

  • Realising how gay and twee you look in your floral onesie riding your pink Repco bicycle down Beaufort Street holding a pair of knitting needles and a glomesh purse you just bought from an old lady op shop near 10th Ave where you laughed so hard you couldn't breathe at (with?) the Italian Nonna in the shop who inquired as to whether "you wanta bigga bag as you driving da bicycle yes?"
  • Going to Nina and Clare's house at 5:30pm on a Monday afternoon and them not being home so you borrow their bicycle pump cus your tire is a little flat and you can't work it for ages and have to sit on a step and smoke a (more like 3) cigarette in order to work it out, while wearing said floral onesie.
  • Still haven't made this Meatcake yet -
  • Realising no matter how hard you try to stretch you're still going to be only 1 and a half inches off the International Cutoff for being a midget
  • Then realising that when you get older you actually shrink and knowing that if you are still friends with Jimmy Hats in 40 years you will never hear the end of it
  • Your attempt at making ravioli fails so you just use the filling and lasagne sheets to make papardelle with smoked salmon, cream cheese, feta, spinach, capers, and cherry tomatoes and then eat the entire pot of said pasta (only takes you 2 goes by the way)
  • The look on peoples faces when you tell them you have never seen any of the original Star Wars movies and then a friend not speaking to you for 2 weeks after you confess (Hi Richard!!)
  • You have an iPhone for 2 days and then something fucks up and it's back to your Nokia that's old enough to be shit but not old enough to be cool like a pager (LOL HOW OBSOLETE) because God doesn't let you have nice things
Embrace the Mini Bummers of life! It's heaps easier to focus on them than to make mountains out of molehills about your REAL problems.


Queefer Sutherland said...



#1 I was sitting in front of the mirror yesterday (literally) when it hit me: I am not going to grow any taller. I am going to be a grown-up woman and still be the same size. It's so weird!

#2 I have a secret about Star Wars but I'm not ready to tell the internet.

#3 I go to my house on Mondays too!


Jane Donut said...

My secret Star Wars embarrassment is that when I was a kid I used to wait for my mum to fall asleep and then I would put on a crop top and undies, tie myself to my fisher and Paykel (sp?) kitchen and act out the scene where Princess Leia is Jaba The Hut's slave. Kind of a sexual fantasy I guess.

Jane Donut said...

Was that TMI? I'm really tired.

NME said...

i dont even know what star wars is really, another "important thing" i have no clue about. like gourmet food, movie directors and music. KNOWLEDGE FAIL!!!!