How much fun is heckling? Especially when your car is full of girls and you holler at hot schoolboys (um, sorry). I am a P-plater driver so it's not that gross, I swear. We don't try to be too creative with our lines, just a general "HEY HOT STUFF" kinda vibe is expressed. If you're driving really slowly, more directed insults and compliments can be thrown out: "NICE HAIRCUT YOU LITTLE FAGGOT BITCH" etc.
Yesterday I was waiting for Gemma to pick me up at Horseshoe Bridge. I was perched daintly on the ledge in my work clothes, looking like a vision of perfection, obviously. A P-plater car full of little ratbags was approaching, I could see their hats perched on the back of their heads from a mile away. I saw them hunch up to their windows, obviously preparing for a heckle. "SUHG MAJH ITCH!!!" they yelled.
Um wtf? Learn to articulate dirtbags! I can't even retaliate if I don't know what you said. I came up with two possibilities: "SUP FAT BITCH!" or "SUCK MY DICK!" and now I don't know whether to go on a diet or to perfom fellatio on you!! WHAT'S A GIRL TO DO?
c) bj a hotdog
Let me know!!
Love Clare xoxo
p.s. - the worst heckling I have ever experienced was getting a bottle thrown at me on Walcott St from a P-plater four wheel drive. They missed, but then they circled around to throw another one at me and yell "FUCKING SLUT". I waited for them to come back with a wine glass in my hand to throw through their window but they never came :( :( :(.
1 day ago