Wednesday, December 24, 2008


Get it, get it guys? Getting on yr rags.
When I was a wee young Perth Socialite (ie 16 years old) I dated a frontman of a live hip hop band, who shall remain anonymous. Said man and I were pretty suited apart from the fact that he was like 6 foot 5 and I was, and shall remain for the rest of my life (until I shrink from old age) 5 foot flat. Also he was a bit of a dweeb and I was a sassy teenager who liked drinking Coronas, taking Lobbers, watching Kung Fu Movies, wearing Denim Jackets and just generally being an all round Good Cunt.
Said Guy, oh, lets call him Mr X, was a bit lacking in the bedroom department, but he generally made up for with enthusiasm and being damn fine at head. Unfortunately he was hit with a double whammy - not generously endowed and also a teeny bit of a premature ejaculation problem as well.
One night I came home from being an underage booze hag at the Scotsman and we got down to it. Wham bam thank you ma'ám, Let's go down town right? Next thing I know he is holding something and looking slightly horrified. That's right. I had been drunk and his dick had been so small that we'd managed to have sex while I still had a tampon in, without any interruptions whatsoever.
I stopped dating musicians then, but unfortunately I never got over my prediliction for tall guys.
As you can see, the whole look at hands feet tallness to dick ratio just isn't true.