Sunday, April 26, 2009

I am officially creeped the fuck out.

So I was just blog trawling as one does in the "blogosphere" and ended up coming across this little gem - http://catacombkids.wordpress.com/.
The writing is pretty good. Whimsical in a way that kind of reminds me of Gemma Ward's sisters horrible blog (the url escapes me right now, but I'm pretty sure it is papercastles or something) in which she talks about "showering thrice, once to wash off my lovers seed from my belly" but not as obnoxious. I get a few posts down and start getting weirded the fuck out.
In 2005 and 2006 I did a bunch of writing for www.crybloxsome.com when it was a literary magazine. I used to put a lot of it up on my livejournal (everyone had one you judger, don't be such a judger mcgee) as well.


Added bonus: What I used to look like during my literary career. I went to Amplifier a lot.

A few posts are sounding so eerily like what I wrote that I had to go sit outside and chainsmoke a few cigarettes to deal. Here's an early foray into said literary career -

*********** wrote,
@ 2005-12-07 15:36:00

Current music:moloko - party weirdo

for ziksre
People often ask me why I take my glasses off during the middle of the night at the sticky floored establishments that I like to haunt. I sneer at them, take whatever it is out of their hand they are drinking slash smoking and help myself.

When they look at me bewildered, and sometimes somewhat angrily, I explain;
Everything is so much prettier when it’s blurry. Which is the crux of life, basically.

I go through stages of liking the harsh reality of the world clear; everyone is so much dirtier, colours are brighter, smiles are dazzling and I can determine just what exactly that stupid fucking moron is wearing in the name of art and individualism.

But if it lasts too long.. I become dizzy and overwhelmed. Everything is too real, and sharp. Intentions are easier to guess and blatant manipulation of people whom you’re supposed to love, cherish and respect is so goddamn obvious. Apparantly only to me.

Everyone else keeps drinking, smoking, shooting, racking, railing, choking themselves and or others, shopping, vomiting, fighting and having hate sex to escape from the harsh mistress that is reality. She’s kind of like the crazy girl you should have never fucked – sometimes it rocks up on your doorstep at 1am, crying, demanding to be let in because you can really “make it work this time.”
I like to reject that reality and substitute my own. So,

I take them off again. Things meld together. I can still recognize who the fuck is trying to stick their hand up my skirt but I feel a bit better about the situation. Girls look prettier and beer seems to taste better, somehow.

I change into a complete different person; and I’m regularly misquoted, misconstrued and misunderstood when I don’t have my glasses on. People don’t take me as seriously (not that they ever really do. I’m permanently slot into the fixture of the cute but annoying little sister) but that has just as much to do with the outlandish behaviour that non-glasses sometimes prompts as well as the fact that what often boils down to an accessory (especially at indie nights) makes people reconsider your whole existence.

The only time I never take my glasses off is when I am alone, I’m comfortable to a certain degree with myself and have slowly but surely realized that in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t matter what the fuck anyone thinks of and about you. I count myself lucky. I know people double my age that haven’t reached that conclusion yet.

Also, I feel much better about the bottomless void that is my future when I can’t focus on you tragic fucks.

And here is the post in question - Blah Blah

Posted by girlfacekiller April 16th 2009

Everything is so much prettier when it’s blurry, which really is one of the cardinal dilemmas of life when you think about it.
Posted by gracey December 7th 2005

When they look at me bewildered, and sometimes somewhat angrily, I explain; Everything is so much prettier when it’s blurry. Which is the crux of life, basically.

Alright, alright I hear ya, this could be a total coinky-dink. Right?

Posted by girlfacekiller April 16th 2009

Everyone around me is drinking, smoking, pilling, racking, railing, snorting, shooting, getting loaded, choking on and all over themselves just to escape reality.
Posted by gracey December 7th 2005

Everyone else keeps drinking, smoking, shooting, racking, railing, choking themselves and or others, shopping, vomiting, fighting and having hate sex to escape from the harsh mistress that is reality. She’s kind of like the crazy girl you should have never fucked – sometimes it rocks up on your doorstep at 1am, crying, demanding to be let in because you can really “make it work this time.”

If you read the rest of her posts, little things out of this one piece I wrote are sprinkled all the way through her entire blog. The weirdest part of this is I can't really think of how this could have eventuated. Either
a) she found my livejournal
or
b) she remembered something from 2005 that was posted on a literary website and kept it.
She was still
c) weird enough to plaigarise it.

1 comment:

Queefer Sutherland said...

Gracey, you are the queen of WTF for the week!!