Buy my lyfe off me.

It is going cheap as I want it off my hands immediately. Here's what you'll get...

-A low bank balance
-A seriously boring job (which you suck at)
-Approx. 200 dresses (that you will never wear)
-Approx 100 VHS (including no less than 6 movies starring Hugh Grant)
-A big mouth
-Faux-feminist persuasion
-A constant feeling of regret
-A 13 year old's attitude to boys
-A deathly fear of zombies
-The occasional blood nose
-The occasional hives break out
-The cases for various indie CDs with pop hits hidden inside
-A shit hair cut
-Crippling self doubt

Come on guys, everything must go!

Love from Geminem xoxo